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25 March 2001 [PM EDITION]
The more astute of you may well have gathered that I've been very quiet this week. For that, I can only apologise : I've been snowed under this week, and by the time it comes to updating, I've usually been so knackered that I can't bring myself to do anything. Also, as it's international week, there really hasn't been much worth writing about. With luck, "normal" service should resume either late this week or earlier next week.
Anyway, not much to report : this week was transfer d-day, and we got David Neilsen and Matthew Booth for not much money. Neilsen is a striker, a permanent signing, he's a striker and he chose us over Grimsby because "Grimsby are a more direct side". Ha ha. Booth is on trial until the end of the season, he was recommended by CK, who gave a tape to TB who liked the look of him, and then offered him a go with us. He's a CB by trade and he's 6 ft 6. So we'll need air traffic control whenever we play him. Neither of them are bank breakers, but quite frankly, when you consider that we paid £2.5m for shite like Roberts in the past, are you really that sorry?
Nothing going on ground wise, I do still hear the occasional MK story going on. These do however go against official statements made by all interested parties, so it really depends on who you are prepared to believe. As ever, you have to keep a bit vigilant just in case, though I wonder how much of it is innuendo? Probably a lot more than you think. I honestly doubt if it is worth losing sleep over.....
Oh, and in the words of Jimmy Hill, have you put your cocks back?
18 March 2001 [AM Edition]
I
tell you what I'm going to do this close season. I am going to reproduce
all the journies I have done this season and call it "Transportation
Of Doom". More on my, ahem, attempts to get there a little later,
but first the match. Time 1 Tiny 1 was a good result against
a team widely tipped for auto promotion this season. In fact, we made
much of the early running. It was described by Sky Sports as an open
game. It's described by SW19 as a game where had we learnt how to
(a) finish and (b) not get quite so stretched in defense we would
have won by more than 1-0. Euell scored for us, Wu Tang and Roberts
missed similar shots. Jansen scored for them, after we found ourselves
about 1 on 3. Still, if you'd asked me 24 hours earlier then I would
have been very happy with a draw....
Onto yesterday's jollities:
Plus points: We didn't lose. Nobody played badly. We looked MUCH more solid and didn't allow Blackburn to come at us a la Grimsby. Good positioning by Euell, Wu Tang and the new guy, Cooper. The way we kept plugging away.
Minus points: We didn't win. Bit slack for their goal. Looked quite lethargic at times during the first half. Having to pay £17 considering my circumstances (see below)
Long: Blackburn railway station to Ewood Park. Especially if you go via the wrong side of Blackburn.
Quotes: (1) "This was the worst I've seen Blackburn play this season. I thought you should have beaten us" - cool Blackburn fan at Preston station on the return. (2) "It's St Patricks Day and I'm still sober" - well known Emerald Isle womble (not the C.U.N Womble I hasten to add), who was a bit flu'ed up. (3) "Roberts had a howler" - paraphrased quote from the radio. Funny, I thought he played OK
Spotted: Peter Cork at Euston, with presumably one of those dodgy Indians* that Peter Mandelson lost his job over. Does Mr Cork want a new passport then?
* - DISCLAIMER: By "dodgy Indians", I am referring to that dodgy Hinduka or whatever their name was family who funded the Millennium Dome white elephant in return for a British passport from Peter "Not Proud To Be Gay" Mandelson and Keith "Why The Fuck Should I Tell You Anything You Racist Bastard" Vaz. This is NOT a slur against Indian people in general, many of whom I have found to be the most honest, hardworking people around. This disclaimer is written because I've been unfairly accused of racism not less than 3 times in the past. I'm not a Man City fan you know.
Truth
Is Stranger Than Fiction (or: Yet another away day travel with WFC): Those who were there, sorry to relive the memories. Those who weren't,
sit back and "enjoy":
Boarded train at 9.10am. Train departs at about 9.20am as scheduled. Bottles of a lager called "Piss" (see right) were being sold for £1 a lob. This despite the same bottles being purchased in a public house for £2. Hmm, great marketing I think not. Sharon may be taking that person on to work for her. Tannoy announcement comes on and says that because of engineering work, we're going via Birmingham and will now get in at 1.30pm (instead of 12.20pm). Oh well. Train goes slowly. Get to M****n K****s Central about half hour later than normal. Go off again. Do the Supporters Coach thing when in that part of the world by seeing Villa Park, point gormelessly and cry "There's Villa's ground". Pass the M42/M6 Interchange. Realise that we're going slower than some of the cars on the middle lane. See Walsall's ground and do the self same thing. Only with more inferior comic timing. Realise that we're now running an hour late. Crawl into Rugby. Find out there is no alcoholic beverages on the train left. Not surprised. Ask the Virgin rep on the train about ETA. Find out that it's now 2.15pm. And the Blackburn train leaves at 2.13pm. Great. Start picking up speed. Realise that we've still got to go through shitholes like Warrington (where it costs a bomb to live, apparently. Very tasteful) and Wigan. Get despondant. Find out that Virgin/Railtrack/Lancashire Police/Some Nice Person has laid on a special bus at Preston station for us, from Preston BR to Ewood Park, police escort and everything. Perk up. Two scouse kids get on and helpfully tell us that Matt Jansen will score a hat-trick today. Tell them to fuck off. They don't. Eventually arrive in deepest Lancashire at 2.20pm. Miss train to Blackburn. Copper comes up to us and points us in the direction of where our transport awaits. Christen said transport as the SW19's ARMY Preston-Ewood Park Funbus of Love. Well I thought it was funny. Funbus is conspicuous by absence. Police say that it'll be there in 5 minutes. Comment that a group of us waiting at a station for the Funbus to arrive is akin to those stories you read in hooligan books about the firm being escored in such transport because they didn't want us about. Check watch. 2.35pm. Get agitated. Police getting concerned. Check watch again. 2.45pm. Decide to get 2.50pm train to Blackburn. Funbus arrives. Much cheering. One number is allowed to take his Stella on the Funbus. Faint. Get on. Go through Preston at rate of knots. Give V-signs to passing gobsmacked locals. Take poor quality photos of Funbus in transit. Comment that they're probably going to take us on the M6 southwards back to London. Everyone laughs. See Funbus turn off onto M6 southwards to London. Stop laughing. Get to Ewood Park at 3.15pm. Told I have to buy a ticket. £17. Swear. Amazingly discover I have £17 exactly. Young bird serving me is grateful. Probably wanted to shag me. Wake up. Run to turnstile. See Mikey T get his overnight bag searched. Mr T looks suitably unimpressed. Get in. Find the hardcore sitting there. Get reliably informed that I've missed the first 15 minutes which happened to be the best 15 minutes of football ever, and anyone who misses it is a sad loser. Swear. Ask score. Get told 0-0. Mentally question fellow Wombles perception of football games. Or realise it was a piss take. Sit down and start taking photos for this site, one does one's priorities straight. And if you found the above heavy reading, then just imagine how I feel living through it.
Of course, it could have been worse: I could have got the 10.25am from Euston which got cancelled, and have to go via Stockport on the Manchester Express. I'm sure Itmustbedons.com and W&WW will expand on that journey far better than I could. They arrived 10 minutes later than I did, and got in for nowt. Bastards. Still, I had the last laugh - they didn't go on the Funbus......
Twat: The drug addict with his slut bird on the Northern Line smoking. When asked to put it out he refused and started swearing a lot. Me, I kept quiet, but it does at least reaffirm my view that drug-taking is a sign of lack of intelligence....
So, was it worth the ordeal as lovingly described above? Well, we didn't lose......
In a nutshell: I'm driving to Bolton
14 March 2001 [AM Edition]
With
results like Fish 1 Fingers 1 I think we can safely forget
the playoffs for this season. According to the radio, Wu Tang scored,
we played pretty well for 80 odd minutes, Jason Euell missed a sitter
to put us 2-0 up then Grimsby piled on the pressure to equalise in
the last minute. According to this website, we got a goal thru Wu
Tang then decided basically to sit back and do that rather lame tactic
of defending a single strike. How many times do we have to say that
it just does not work? The problem I think is that most of the players
midfield are not Tezzaball players : we were without Damo and Trond
(foot infection, probably got that off a rabid Palace player), and
it showed. Can you really say that Ardley, Hughes, Roberts and Hunt
are our best centre of park combo? No. Anyhow, we threw it away and
as a result we aren't going up. Period.
Onto the action:
Plus points: We didn't lose. Kelvin played well. Wu Tang scoring again.
Minus points: We didn't win. Conceding a last minute goal (even if they did put us under the cosh for most of the second half). I can see why TB is so keen on signing another midfielder or two - apart from Hunt all the rest of them were relics from OGEM days. With the same approach to the game.
Very bad: Players not acknowledging the fans after the game. That was a bit of a slap in the face - I don't care how disappointed they were.
Quotes: (1) "They've got a poor attitude......more to the point, I want to know where this attitude is coming from" - a passing through Womble after the game. It does make you wonder, well it makes me wonder anyway. (2) I promise not to embarass the person who said that they "liked the taste of freshly ejaculated semen" and later claimed that I "had good technique with my tongue" by mentioning it on this site. So I won't.
Hughes watch: Laid on the goal and did fuck all else. Goes into that rather annoying habit of taking the ball, holding it up and allowing the opposition to get back, which on past performances is totally antithesis to what TB is installing in our players. Is he not fit enough? Seemed OK to me. I know that in the rules of supporting WFC, one must never criticise Michael Hughes ever and instead worship him like a deity regardless, but he ain't our best player. Wild Thang makes much more of a difference than he does, and many people may be in for a shock come the summer.
Excuses?: Apparently, Mark Williams was saying that he was "knackered" on Sunday at having to play all these games.
SW19 can exclusively reveal....: Saw Barney before the game, had a nice chat. Asked him about signings and said that they were "talking to a lad". Wouldn't say any more, but I don't expect him to - careless talk costs lives after all. Still, once again it shows that this site has its finger on the pulse........ :)
So, was it worth it? Well, I got to see Grimsby.
Come on, answer the question: Oh all right then. It might have been worth it had we won.
In a nutshell: Play like this against Blackburn and we've had it.
10 March 2001 [Final Edition]
Ha
ha ha. Tenants 1 Squatters 0 was fun wasn't it? To be fair,
it wasn't the best derby game you'll ever see though there was plenty
of needle about. Forget Fulham - the main rivalry is Palace.
I think this meant a lot more to us than perhaps we realise.
The game? Well, Wu Tang netted once, had a perfectly good goal disallowed for offside and missed a 1-on-1 with the goalkeeper. Still, he's young. Michael Hughes returned for the first time in about a year, and was given a suitable reception. Me, I'm still not entirely convinced that he's our best player : that honour would go to KC or Wild Thang. But still, he keeps the masses happy.....
On with the show:
Plus points: A win. No goals conceded. Against that inbred lot as well. Nobody played badly. Kelvin made some sublime saves. Made some good passing on a shite pitch - well, what else do you expect on a surface owned by loan sharks?
Minus points: We did let Palace back into it quite a bit. Wasn't overly impressed with Jason Euell today.
Ugly: Palace fans. They really ARE ugly. The sort you see hanging around Games Workshop in Croydon. A bit mouthy as well, but that's only to hide their many insecurities.
Yeah.......: Talk that Palace were going to "take" the Farley before the game didn't exactly materialise. In fact, WFC and Palace were mixing quite well before the game. Unfortunately, there was an incident involving 3 CP fans and 1 WFC fan but the bouncers put themselves a bit.
Truth is stranger than fiction: (1) Had to go into the Clifton instead to do business and was served by the very same bird who used to serve me at SP. Even more strange, she recognised me. And in case you're wondering, I would like to fuck her. (2) The very well suntanned Palace fan who was happily hawking US cigarettes in self same pub at £2 a box. Very reasonable. Very illegal. Still, I admire his enterprise - give him a couple of years he'll be buying Palace with the proceeds. Hey, do you think that half of Jordan's stock at Carphone Warehouse is legal?
Chants: I forget the actual chant being used, but when we used the phrase "squatters" towards them, they just didn't know how to react. Let me explain - see, WFC are tenants because we are paying rent through a legally signed document called a "contract". Palace are squatters because they are doing the same thing but are claiming rights to land they do not own. Do you understand? Me speak English. Oh, forget it....
Anything else? Yeah - wasn't it funny that we charged Palace £18 whilst they only charged us £10. That'll teach Jordan to try and fuck with the Wombles.
Was it worth it? Oh come on........
In a nutshell: Ha.
10 March 2001 [AM Edition]
Couple of things before our game with the other squatters at the dump : WISA released a press, er, release within the last 12 hours. As you may or may not know, they met with WFC, Merton Council, Wimbledon Civic Forum and Casale yesterday morning. Here is the text of it all:
"On 9th March, a meeting took place between Roger Casale MP, Wimbledon Football club, Merton Council, Wimbledon Independent Supporters Association and Wimbledon Civic Forum.
"The purpose of the meeting was to give a fresh impetus to moves to bring Wimbledon F.C. back to the borough and to examine what practical steps must be taken to make the return of the Club a reality.
"Wimbledon Football Club made clear its committment to bringing the Club back to a ground in or near Merton, if a feasible business case can be made. The Club also made clear its continuing committment to the local community and to the fans.
"Merton Council will work with Wimbledon F.C. to identify possible sites in or near Merton for a new stadium and assist the Club in preparing any subsequent planning application.
"We ruled out Prince George's Playing Fields on Kingston Road in Raynes Park as a possible site for the stadium.
"We have all agreed to do our best to promote a return of Wimbledon F.C. to Merton and to work together proactively to achieve this end. We have also agreed to meet again in due course to review progress. We urge all members of the community to work with us to achieve a return of Wimbledon F.C. to a stadium in or near Merton."
Well, a positive start if nothing else. Everyone agrees that we've got to be back in Merton for a start. I'm optimistically cautious, nothing more at this stage. We have been down this exact road before - in 1992, in 1998 post-Dublin, I'm sure there are many more occasions where we've got our hopes up only for them to be dashed again. That said, we are dealing with different representatives here : we've got rid of that cunt who's now the Putney MP (forget his name), and WFC are far less likely to throw a major strop every time somebody suggests that you do have to pay for land in this country...
Anyway, reading the actual press release (which I'm told is very generalised so I'm probably being un-necessarily harsh), we are naming unobtainable sites but dismissing them. Why? Because of the NIMBYs that's why. A clever PR trick if nothing else. Other than that, it's the usual spiel and until further progression IS made we haven't really got further forward. Wait and see - we've done that for a decade.
Speaking of 10 year periods, if you go here then you'll see a new project by Dave Challinor. It's self explanatory and I hope as many people respond to it as possible. It's for a good cause as well so no slacking :)
More later.
8 March 2001
In probably the biggest shock transfer of the season - well, since Double H went to Ipshit anyway - Marcus Gayle is now a Glasgow Rangers player. For the princely sum of £1m no less. A shot from the dark obviously, but not a reason to slit your wrists IMO. Forget why he's gone there, it's obviously Dick Advocaat gone mad, but Gayle was considered one of the much vaunted "Famous Five" of players to be sold as and when a suitable opportunity arose. And this was such an opportunity.
So, am I going to give him a rapturous sendoff like others are doing? Not really. Firstly, if we're being totally honest, Gayle has been pretty crap for about the last couple of seasons. He - like many others - are basing his legendary status on a few good games in 1996/97. Since then he's been nothing special. Even before then, he wasn't really the major cog in the wheel. Yeah, he played a lot, but then so did people like Alan Reeves. So why am I so bitter? Two reasons : one, although he publically denied it all, including to the face (practically speaking) of W&WW's JZ, I was hearing stories of his discontentment as far back as Burnley away this season. That's as far back as August, and when you read in tabloids about how unhappy Gayle is at being on the bench, you do start to wonder. Secondly, there is a little thing called "loyalty" here. Witness the hand-clapping and shirt kissing against Stockport. Wonderful, you may think, and it shows he cares about WFC. So why then did he slag our crowds off the very minute he joined Rangers? Needless to say, it was a cheapshot, though given the fact he was a stalwart of the OGEM era I shouldn't really be surprised at all. No bouquets here I'm afraid, I'm just happy that the wage bill has been lightened further.
One other thing, given his penchant for strange religious habits and somewhat obsessive nature towards the Good Lord [sic], isn't Glasgow Rangers such an apt club for him? And no, that comment has nothing to do with the fact I support Celtic.
Oh, and I promise to get the archive done ASAP. Honest - I've got something like 80 pages of H&S stuff to sort out....
6 March 2001
Well
that was a really awe inspiring trip down to Kent I don't think. Pikeys
0 Pokeys 0 was so close to throwing up that bizzare sort of game
called "end-of-season fare" that I swear the season was
over already. Ever since Wild Thang departed on Saturday I think we've
given up play-off berths. No bad thing IMO, but still it would be
nice to actually get a few more wins under our belt.
Now, if you actually expecting some sort of report on the match, don't trouble. As the picture to your left shows, I could see fuck all. Just as well, according to those over 5 ft 6" tall and with better memories than me...
Anyway.
Plus points: Not losing. Or conceding a goal
Minus points: Not winning. Or scoring a goal
Yuk: The weather
Yuk x2: Gillingham. One big caravan park
Truth is stranger than fiction: Hearing the immortal lines from Up The Junction by Squeeze : "I never thought it would happen with me and the girl from Clapham, out on the windy common, that night I ain't forgotten". Immortal, because at the time said lyrics were being broadcast, we were on the road by Clapham Common. And it was windy. And it was night. No girls though.
Step back in time: Some people love terracing and hate modern all-seater stadia. After today, and Saturday, I say that the sooner they flatten the remaining terraces and put something remotely more habitable in its place, the better.
Worth it?: Well, I did get to go to Gillingham, which works out at something like my 58th or 59th league ground. Other than that, not really.
In a nutshell: I paid £13 for this?
3 March 2001
Good
grief - I thought we never had these sort of matches these days. For
those at Cunty 2 Genitalia 2 was a rather depressing step back
in time. Witness : the game was one of the worst I've seen for a l--o--n--g while, all the fluid passing, penetrative and combative style seemed
to have gone. It was FUCKING cold, stood on a terrace, my lunch consisted
of what can best described as Westler's Rubber Sole and some cola
substitute complete with cheap sherbert, and realising to myself "why
am I here?". The game? Oh yeah, we went 1-0 down, then we equalised
through Wu Tang. Half time came and went, we scored thru Trond then
they equalised. And, er, that was about it. What else can I say about
the game? Er. Um. Well, you see, ur, it was, well, you know.
Oh fuck it, here goes:
Plus points: Well, one point is better than 3. And I can now say I've visited Stockport. 58 grounds down, only another 34 to go.
Minus points: Turning up. Kelvin's handling. Wild Thang getting kicked and going off. That's him gone for the next 2 years.
Dump: Stockport.
Point to ponder: Why is it that the local Labour club next door to the ground (had to pay to get in, though hopefully my money won't go to any political organisation) has the not very socialist Sky TV showing?
Disappointing: (1) The away
turnout. As can be seen to your left. Bit wanky isn't it? Those who
went did well as usual, though a crap game, cold conditions and a
terrace sans roof doesn't exactly make things heaving. (2)
The team performance. We are not playoff material. Recognise this
fact.
Truth is stranger than fiction: (1) Realising that I actually went from SW19 Towers to Berkshire today. (2) Realising that I actually continued on the journey to Stockport. (3) After the game, David Barnard saw me, put his arm around me then decided to playfully punch me in the stomach. Why? Have I upset WFC that much? (4) Seeing Scottish males in kilts. In deepest Berkshire.
Quotes: (1) "Looking at this, I still reckon that you could have redeveloped Plough Lane" - the C.U-N Womble, making his, er, triumphant return to the SW19 Quotes section. I think the little "p" word is a valid reason...... (2) "I don't think he'll be wearing any gloves" - rather obtuse reference to the referee, who through birth deformity only has 1.5 hands. How tasteful.....
When in Maidenhead.... : If you see a P-reg black Renault Laguna with "Also In Black" written in teutonic-type lettering on the dirt on the back, the editor of this site has absolutely nothing to do with it. No way. Honest. 110% straight.
Come on, it was worth it, wasn't it? Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Sorry, what was the question?
In a nutshell: We've got a **long** way to go.....