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29 April 2001
Apologies for the lateness of the report.
"REPD
says ... nothing you idiot! REPD's dead. He's locked in my basement
..." Seriously, JC on the mic while REPD's living it up with
the yanks. So here goes ... Egypt 1 Norway 1. Well this was
clearly a game of two halves, err hold on, no, two penalties. This
game was our last chance to keep the play-offs in sight. Suffice to
say we blew it! But what gives me heart, is the manner in which we
did so. We gave the 'champions' a run for their money (which they've
obviously got too much of, just ask Mr T Bates). A Wimbledon side
missing one Mark Williams, showed determination in abundance, in front
of a pathetic bumper crowd at Craven Cottagen of
18,000. We were well up for this one, and almost got a result, but
for a cheating paid fixed eagle-eyed referee. The first half saw us create very little for Euell
and Nielsen to chase. In fact, some would say that Foolham were the
'better' side for much of the first period. Nonetheless, the Dons
came out second half determined to spoil the party. We began to put
some nice passing moves together, and it was only a matter of time
before we went ahead. Foolham goalkeeper Maik(?) Taylor, clearly brought
down Sooper Cooper as he attempted to take the ball round him on the
74th minute. Jason Euell duly converted the penalty, and sent the
Dons masses into ecstasy. However, instead of our normal sitting back
on the one-goal lead, Foolham applied the pressure, which was well
defended against by the Wimbledon rear guard of Kimble, Holloway,
Cunnigham and Gier. With only three minutes of normal time to be played,
some theatrics from Portuguese reject star Luis Boa
Morte, was enough to fool the referee into awarding a penalty to Al
Fayed's men. Boa Morte scored the penalty despite the best efforts
of Kelvin Davis, and that was that.
On with the action then:
Plus points: We could, and should have beaten the champions. Euell grabbed (by my reckoning) his 20th league goal this season. The Wimbledon following, never subdued despite see minus points. Kelvin Davis, back to his best. Our defensive performance. The atmosphere in the Kings Head pub before the game. The boat trip.
Minus points: Not making the play-offs. Conceding a penalty with three minutes left. The referee. The weather (it pissed down for much of the day). The Putney terrace (it had no roof, cheers Al Fayed). Our lack of chances created.
Quotes: 1) A number of Wimbledon supporters towards the back, right corner of our terrace allocation: "Fulham 'til you're shit!" 2) Certain webmaster of a certain 'rival' site: "I take it they didn't have the shirt in your size then." Cheers dude, but I still think it's fine. NB - most quotes were too offensive to repeat on this 'child-friendly' (ahem) site, and were incidentally aimed at either i) Al Fayed ii) Mr Bates iii) Luis Haha.
Fiction is stranger than truth ... errr ... no hold on: For the second time this season, Wimbledon supporters provoked a reaction from Luis Haha. This time it was as he was leaving the pitch after picking up an injury. I can't tell you what was said, though he picked up a lot of abuse after the said incident. Also, we (wombles massive) were recorded on police cameras as soon as we arrived in Putney. If anyone took down any officer numbers, go ask for a copy of the tape ;-)
In a nutshell: It's been one of the most exciting seasons witnessed by Wimbledon supporters for a long time. Now it's all but over, and all that remains to be done, is ensuring that Palarse get relegated. Field the youths against Huddersfield Terry? Of course not, that would be unsportsman-like ;-)
Was it worth it?: Hell yeah!
Oh and ... : Today saw the relegation of the worst team ever to have stayed in the Premier League for more than one season. No prizes for guessing who I'm talking about. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!
JC ... ahhh shite! No porn references ... d'oh!
24 April 2001
And
as sure as night follows day, as sure as light follows dark, as soon
as the weather follows the news, as sure as.... (that's enough). Sorry, Commuters 0 Railwaymen 3 was as...... hold on, that's Commuters
3 Railwaymen 3. Look, I think I ought to explain. We scored twice
after 4 minutes. And don't ask me who scored because I don't know.
Our first goal saw me negotiating the stairs between the turnstile
and the concourse. The second goal saw me in the bog. And the third
goal was down to Darren Foreman and the SP refreshment stall (ask
Mr F, he'll tell you). So really I have no tangiable report for you.
Oh yes, I definitely saw Crewe's goals, bastards. But like
fuck I'm going to explain in detail about them. Jesuz fucking christ,
ask anyone sitting near me after the WFC third goal just what my mental
state of mind was....
Not too sure if I have the will to live ATM, let alone the remainder of the game (the bits I saw) but here goes:
Plus points: Well, we scored three goals certainly.
Minus points: But we conceeded three goals as well.
Who, what, why, where, when? Oh jesuz, I don't know. One thing is for sure, there are plenty of people currently unimpressed with Kelvin Davis. Indeed, some I know are of the opinion that the defense is shit for a lot of the time because of the inability of Davis to catch any crosses whatsoever. Me, I'm saying nowt.
Quotes: (1) "We need a new ground, a new manager, new owners who will put some money in, heated seats, topless waitresses" - somebody on their mobile after the game. Haven't got the heart to argue that TB has done way better than expected this season AND the "throw money at new players" strategy is a great deal of the reason why we're in the first division in the first place. (2) "FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK etc" - your humble and esteemed editor, after we went 3-1 up. Believe me, I was inconsoliable afterwards. Still am, come to think of it (3) "Please leave. Go to toilet, or go home, or anything" - the kind hearted generosity of those around me after said third goal was missed. I love you guys. No, really. (4) "Shit ground no lights" - the reason for the pic above was the Oval-esque temporary floodlights. Basically, the crappy electrical supply at SP buggered the floodlights up so they couldn't be put on full power. Hence the costly hire of the temp lights. And this is at a ground which is the third biggest club in London. Jeez, sooner we leave this shit the better.
So, what does this do for playoffs?: Not much, I think we waved goodbye to them tonight. Burnley won, for starters.
It's not all bad news though: Luton are down. Which means OGEM has relegated 2 clubs in one season. Pretty impressive. But none of it is his fault, oh no.
So then, was it worth it?: Well the radio said what a great game it was. Sadly I wasn't so sure....
In a nutshell: Thank fuck my next report will be in July.......
21 April 2001
Don't
tell me that the playoffs are still possible - that said, Copse
2 Forest 1 has ensured that we're now into nose bleed territory.
Well, 9th anyway. Let's not beat about the bush (no pun intended)
- this was a very good Forest side that we did the double over today,
and more to the point we did it without some of our "best"
players playing. You know, Wild Thang, Wu Tang, Michael Hughes etc.
Returning was Jason Euell who seemed to change things, it'll be a
shame if/when he goes because he definitely made a difference today,
Neilsen clearly benefitting. Indeed, it was Neilsen who netted first,
with some good stuff from Cooper. Sooper then made it 2-0 with a stunning
goal before Stern John (oh what a name) pulled one back with about
15 minutes to go. But we held on and perhaps the playoffs aren't as
far fetched as some of us are still making out........
On with the action
Plus points: We won. Generally solid performance. Great games for Euell, Neilsen and Cooper. Andy Roberts played well for about the third game in a row (is this a record?). Good passing and intelligent play, considering the pitch would have been better suited for dumping burning foot-and-mouth cases. Doing so without our "best" players in the starting XI. In fact, not having to call on even one substitute.
Minus points: Conceeding a goal - got very nervy later on.
Scary: I'm sorry, I just don't like KD punching the ball out.......
Truth is stranger than fiction: (1) If you think that WFC have fallen in stature recently, what would you make of Forest's decline? (2) At least our third double this season - as many as we've had in the previous 36 months. (3) It was my mum's birthday. And we never win on that day......
And if you think it couldn't get any better: Coventry look virtually doomed, Celsi lost, Palace are in shit........
Quote: "You're just going for the fights aren't you?" - my mum after I told her my intention of going to the possibility of Palace vs Brighton / Milwall vs Man City/Birmingham City next season, WFC games permitting. Moi?
So, was it worth it? Oh certainly.
In a nutshell: Bring on the Crewe........
18 April 2001 [AM EDITION]
Is
the play-off dream still possible? Well, after Blades 0 Carving
Knife 1 I'm starting to think a bit more positively about our
chances. I have to say, we didn't play particularly well, but it's
these grinding type displays that often separates the successful from
the pseudo. Or something. Andy Roberts scored following a free kick
from Neil Ardley, though really we could have gained a couple from
Neilsen, Cooper, GarethAinsworth.Com and Wayne Gray (who made a superb
run from the half way line, just placing his shot a couple of inches
wide). Will we reach the playoffs? TBH, I doubt it, there were plenty
of times last night when the words "season", "end",
"fare" and "of" sprung to mind. Maybe it was the
£18 that did it for me. Hmm. Still, I'm not complaining about
a win.....
Shall we?
Plus points: We won. Away from the Cesspit. And without conceding a goal. Defence played well (though they had to, see "minus points"). Good running from people like Neilsen and Wayne Gray.
Minus points: I'm sorry, but Andy Roberts and (especially) Neil Ardley are slow as fuck. Their lack of pace put our defense through more pressure than necessary.
Where to improve: Next season, Tezza, get two players for the midfield. One who can cross the ball, like Ardley can once in a while, and one who can play the Andy Roberts role. They have to have the pace and ability to get back to help our defense, which is what we DON'T have ATM. It cost us many a point last season, this season could have had similar consequences.
Truth is stranger than fiction: (1) GarethAinsworth.Com got mercilessly booed by the Sheff Utd fans. Everyone was perplexed, but I can now exclusively (ha ha) reveal that whilst playing for Port Vale, he did a tackle that ended Dane Whitehouses' career. So now you know. Coincidentally, the Blades are trying to organise a benefit match for Whitehouse, which begs two questions. Why is it taking them so long to organise one and will GarethAinsworth.Com be invited? (2) Our record in Yorkshire this season. P 4 W 4 D 0 L 0 F 9 A 0. Suddenly, I start liking Yorkshire a lot.
Stewardwatch: OK then boys and girls, a little game for you. Out of the following words, which are most likely to cause offense to a Sheff Utd steward? (1) Fuck, (2) Cunt, (3) Bollocks, (4) Muppet. The answer is of course (4), the look the C.U.N.W got when he said the word "muppet" to a steward was somewhat evil. Methinks the steward had a little Kermit doll when he was a kid and it got mauled by next door neighbour's dog. Hence the psychological problems. Also, this was the first time ever that I have been to a football match where photographs were discouraged.......
Obligatory
shot of a football ground toilet in Yorkshire: Yes,
the long awaited "worst toilet in the first division" competition
is back. Please examine the er, stinkhole to your right. The beautifully
peeling paintwork on the urinal, complete with sludge and fuck knows
what else (not pictured, thankfully). A fine example of contemporary
early 20th Century urinals. Whilst maybe not on a par with Barnsley,
it is a fine relic to those used to brand new all-seater stadia what
football attendance was REALLY like pre-Taylor report.
Quotes: (1) "Don't die of a heart attack, ref" - the now expected tasteful comment made after the referee fucked up yet again. It's more than my jobsworth to tell you who exactly said that...... (2) "£18? You're not even a Premiership club" - another Womble outside Bramhall Lane. They were once, just like us....
Just thought I'd mention it: Keith Judas Curle is STILL a cunt. No, he didn't actually do anything yesterday but hey, why waste a good opportunity?
So, was it worth it? Why yes, I think so.
In a nutshell: Do you think we'll..... nah. Surely not.
17 April 2001 [AM EDITION]
Right, brief update before I swan off to Sheff Utd this evening : should be an unchanged team from Saturday, with luck they'll figure that games are there to be won. It's generally considered that if we lose tonight, the playoffs are over for this season. Even if we do win, they're still a tall order. But hey, who gives a fuck? We've done far better this season than many expected, so anything else is, as CK/BRG say, a bonus. Personally, I think that it's no big deal if we don't go up, because we can blood some more players for the rest of this season and - most importantly - the pressure will be off.
Some interesting comments from Wild Thang, more or less reiterating the above. But he seemed to make a swipe at Neil Ardley, mentioning something about those players who want to leave wishing they'd have stayed. Shame I don't have the original quote on me, it was pretty interesting.
Site news : in case you don't read the guestbook, I'm going to be away AGAIN in the USA, this time from 27 April to the 11 May. So I'm missing the last 3 games of the season. A couple of people have expressed interest in writing articles, if so, I want them by the 25 April AT THE VERY LATEST. Like fuck am I going to publish anything when I'm away, so get them in PDQ. When I come back, I'll be doing the EOSP, which if nothing else will keep me busy during the summer months. I'm also awaiting the planned pre-seasons, but I bet that we'll play at least 3 of the following : Yeovil, Torquay, Plymouth, Exeter, Sutton, Kingstonian, Swindon, Bournemouth. And all the long ones will be in the evening as well. And I've also updated the links page. Forward all complaints to the usual address....
Report tomorrow AM.
14 April 2001
Good
fucking grief, do I really have to do a report on Stockbroker Belt
1 Not Working Yorkshire Miners 1? Oh, I see. Well, to be honest,
I think we should forget about the playoffs now. Today was one of
those sort of games I never thought existed any more : file under
"end of season fare", except that both teams still can reach
playoffs. On our performance certainly, if we did get into the playoffs
and got promoted, we'd be relegated by about December. OK, enough
cynicism, our goal was scored by Gareth Ainsworth following a good
cross by Neil Ardley. Who did fuck all else. No, I'm being unkind,
he wasn't the only one who did fuck all else. Most of them just look
mentally out of it, guess the season has finally caught up with them.
And no amount of squad rotation will hide it.
If I really have to continue (you can tell I don't really want to write this), here's the SP:
Plus points: We scored. We didn't lose
Minus points: We didn't win. And nobody played well at all.
Most apt name for an opposition player: Dyer by name, dire by nature. Special mention goes to ex-Palace player Neil Shitley. Sorry, Shipperley.
Cunt: The ref. What an absolute joke. Those there will know what I mean when I say that Stevie Wonder could have done better.
Truth is stranger than fiction: Well, I would say me actually bothering to write a report on such turgid shit, but then that's being cynical. Anyway, the fact that this very game sneaked up on me today is strange enough - I totally forgot it was on until 12.30pm. Sadly, I don't think things got any better.
Excuses Quotes: TB blamed
the pitch, saying "I've invited Man U down to have a decent game
on this pitch".
Still, could be worse: We could be Palace, and lose 4-1 at Sheff Weds.
Was it worth it? Debatable.
In a nutshell: Pity the poor KFAQ brigade......
11 April 2001
Well,
after yesterday's debacle, I decided tonight to partake in some real
football. Well, I went to the reserves anyway. And what a humdinger
it was - we beat Derby 2-0 with strikes from Dessie Byrne (penalty)
and somebody called McMuff. Or McAnuff. Or something. Anyway, it was
good play from TB's favourite youngster, the Exciting Lionel Morgan
(hey, that's a cool nickname if ever I saw one).
So what? Well, firstly, major thanx to Mags for the use of her digicam and especially the mass of floppy disks I got through. Beats the shit out of the SW19 Digital Instamatic certainly. Secondly, this was practically major upset city : we are currently bottom (or were bottom) of the FA Prem Reserves whilst Derby were, well, top. Yup, top.
Thirdly,
we didn't have a bad side out : with the absence of a team sheet in
front of me, we had Lionel Morgan, Michael Thomas, Ian Selley, Des
Byrne, Matt Booth (looks promising), Voodoo and the cult figure Carl
Leaburn playing. Who disturbingly always looks happy. Overall, it's
not a bad team. I can't really see Thomas or Selley making the grade
at WFC again, and I think this has to be Leaburn's level, but Lionel
and Dessie should be first teamers next season if we don't go up.
As for Matt Booth, he did nothing wrong. Showed some good touches,
good in the air, if we keep him on he could be a very useful aquisition.
If you've never gone to a reserve game before, they're good fun. If
you have an ST, you get in for nowt, the bar's nice and the clientele
are, well, lively. We're playing Celsi there next week. Be there or
be a cubular shaped object
10
April 2001
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
THUMP!!!!!! Was that the sound of our season crashing tonight? Not
quite, but Puke Colour 0 Clarets 2 bought us back to earth
quicker than you could say "defensive frailties". I don't
think I need to repeat what happened in the game, needless to say
we were 2-0 down at half time, Trond and Kelvin went off through knocks
- WFC are doing our own form of squad rotation ATM - and for only
the second time a team has done the double over us this season. Other
than that, it was probably one of those games - before tonight we
have been unbeaten in open play since Pompey away, since then JH has
left, KC, Hughes and Ainsworth (twice) have come back, Darren Holloway
has started to look good, Wu Tang is looking sharp and Cooper and
Neilsen are now wearing WFC colours. So no wrist slitting exercises
please....
On with the post mortum:
Plus points: None. We didn't even fucking score.
Minus points: Oh dear, where shall I start? Nobody played well at all, far too much loose passing, no obvious penetration, Roberts and Ardley looked crap (and were getting some stick as well), is that enough? No? OK then - both Burnley goals were soft as shite and why did we play arial tonight when the smallest Burnley player was 6 ft 2?
Is there anything remotely positive from tonight?: Yeah, the realisation that maybe the playoffs AREN'T a formality. Yeah, I treat that as positive, especially when you consider this.....
Quotes: "They [WFC] showed that they're not good enough for the playoffs" - my dad. If you think tonight was a comedown, just imagine the low we'd get if we got to the playoffs and lost.
Truth is stranger than fiction: Out of our remaining games this season, only one team - Foolham - can do the double over us. And what's even more strange, we can do the double over at least 3 teams.
So was it worth...... oh, forget it: Urm........
In
a nutshell: The
next 14 game unbeaten run starts Saturday
7 April 2001
Two
major pieces of news for you tonight, the second one later. The first
one is obviously Bruise 3 Blues 1 and our second double this
season. We practically carried off where we left off against Wolves
- plenty of incisive passing, class finishing and a shitty ref to
boot. The opening was, er, opened by one David "No Nickname"
Neilsen, following a traditional route 1 clearance from Kelvin. The
old methods are often the best. Brum seemed to do a lot of chasing
and a bit of kicking, but today it didn't quite work out for them.
Ha. Hughes scored the second with a wonderful free kick. OK, I've
given Hughes a hard time recently - and justifiably so IMO - but today
he did show a bit more willingness to play as a team. Mark Williams
netted about 2 minutes later before their goal in the 86th minute,
which coincidentally was WAAAAAAAY offside.
Anyway, that's the boring match description shit over with, let's get down to the fun stuff :
Plus points: We won. Against a promotion "cert" team. Getting a double over them. Nobody played badly, though some may disagree about Ardley. Good SP debuts for Cooper and Neilsen. Very good goal for Neilsen. As stated above, Hughes finally played today with a conviction that may justify his hefty wage bill.
Minus points: Their goal which gave me just a slight anxiety attack for the last 8 minutes of the game. Which, as previously mentioned, was WAAAAAAAY offside.
Sad: The Birmingham support. Not exactly the fullest I've ever seen the Arthur Wank stand. In fact, I would say that they took similar today as we did to St Andrews, and we've got no fans of course. Also, they hardly sung and a lot of them fucked off after the third goal. And Karen "I swallow, me" Brady claims they're a bigger club than Villa? Yeah, OK.....
Funny: The Brum substitute getting substituted before half time. The look on Trevor Francis' face was not one of enjoyment or sympathy, I can tell you.
Er..............: Examine the picture
to your left. Yup, these boards are all around the Holmesdale death
traps concourses advertising Palaces' new online betting service.
Yeah, I know it's an NTL job and yeah, I know that WFC are doing exactly
the same thing, but come on, would you even trust Jordan with 1p of
your hard-earned dough, let alone £10?? I can see it now : you've
put £10 on the Grand National via Eagles Bet, your horse wins
with odds of 20/1 and you suddenly find that your winnings have suddenly
"disappeared", whilst Jordan is quoted in the Racing Post
laughing that he's now got enough dough to open another shitty Carphone
Warehouse store. Hey, ask any Palace fan about the result of the Palace
Trust last season in case you doubt that.
Speaking of the Grand National: SW19 had Smarty at 18/1 each way thru Billy Hill on a £2 total stake. Yeah, hardly winning the lottery, but it means that I can now buy a beer on Tuesday without having to remortgage my house quite so much.
Quotes: "I hope we get Birmingham in the playoffs" - overheard whilst leaving today. Still reckon it'll be more likely to be next year.
Worth it? What, a 14 game unbeaten run coupled with a win on the horses? Oh come on now......
In a nutshell: Roll on Burnley.
The second major bit of news tonight is this - we're looking for a new Chief Executive. Yup, in other words, David Barnard is no longer with WFC. Now, why has he gone? Has he had a row with CK? Has he been sacked? Or has he simply jumped of his own accord? The truth we will probably never really know, but as it stands, we have nobody to deal with transfers.
So, why has he gone? There are so far three major theories that are being entertained, the "CK and Barney had a major barney" - no pun intended, "CK sacked Barney because too much information was being seeped out from the club", or "Barney left because CK thought he was crap at his job". The first one is interesting, there have been the occasional report of tension between the two, and maybe things got bought to a head? The second one could hold water : the club are clamping down on "insider" info coming out, supposedly, and Barney paid because of that. Although you can [CENSORED on advisement]. IIRC Barney hasn't. Why are WFC clamping down on such activities? Cover-up? Too much gross mis-representation of the club's intentions? Did somebody mention "smear campaign"? Hmm. The third one may well be too obvious - as pointed out to me only this afternoon, why should the cutting of the wage bill be restricted to the playing staff? Barney wasn't being paid a shit wage, certainly, and maybe he too benefitted from Hammam's wall pissing exercise? Also, was Barney crap at his job? Consider this : he was asked by BRG to look into a media/PR department. Can you see one? Also, the SP Chief Steward once had some choice words about him after not being invited to a meeting about the stewarding.........
Am I taking swipes at Barney? Nah, not really, I always got on all right with him, but as somebody else put it to me today, "what did he do apart from talk to the fans?". Regardless, the future is now most important. I myself reckon that although Barney was the first major admin cull to go, he certainly won't be the last. I wonder how much thin ice people like Reg Davis, Sharon (DB's "Golden Girl" apparently : note that her and DB joined the upper WFC echelons at about the same time...) and even Steve Rooke are skating on? I'd be very surprised if at least one (or all three) are still at WFC this time next year. As on the pitch this season has shown, reputations and prestige (or lack of it) are counting for less and less at WFC 2001, who's to say something similar isn't happening off it? And if it is, why do you think I'm not exactly upset........................?
5 April 2001 [AM EDITION]
Wahey,
that's more like it. Wolves 0 Great Danes 1 was the kind of
result that we needed for our playoff push. Only another 8 wins needed
out of our nine games...... As for the match itself, it was probably
our overall best performance since Brum this season (and I include
Blackburn in that). We bossed the game early doors thru to last closing
and reduced Wolves to one attempt. Us? Well, the impressive David
Neilsen nearly netted after a minute, we just kept pushing forward
for the most part, and when Neil Ardley struck (off the post it has
to be said) we got our just reward. We could have got 2 or 3 more
if the truth was known, unlike Brum though we didn't quite put the
chances away. Interesting that Hughes was dropped - when he came on
it seemed to affect our shape a little. None the less, this was a
great performance and well worth the, er, skank I managed to do to
get in. Ho hum.
Shall we?
Plus points: We won. We didn't concede a goal. Solid defense. MOM was definitely Holloway - he was sublime. Nobody else played badly. Great save from Kelvin when it looked like Wolves could have sneaked back into it. Good use of the wings, it caught them out time and time again. People like Sooper Cooper and David "no nickname" Neilsen are justifying TB's transfer policy now. No Nickname clapping us off twice when he was subbed - and without prompting too. Sweet.
Minus points: Yeah, OK, we only won by 1 goal and I think we sat back a little bit after it, but I would be churlish if I wrote it down and put it up (er....)
Nice: Molineux. For the uninitiated, it's built by a flyover in the centre of town in a valley next door to a big Asda. Shows what could be done, eh WFC?
Not so nice: The half-pounder I had outside the ground. I think it had bubonic plague in it, let alone BSE. Definitely not as good as West Brom's slabs of meat.
Pricks: The Wolves fans who congregate by the away fans. Silent for about 89 minutes of the game, only waking up after we scored purely to make threatening gestures towards us. Next time, don't bother turning up, eh? Oh, and you're about as hard as my dick after watching a porno with Bella Emberg, ie not very.
Truth is stranger than fiction: Do you realise this is our first ever win at Molineux?
Question: What the fuck does Molineux mean anyway?
Quotes: (1) "If we can maintain this [run of form], anything can happen" - TB. Anything can happen, hmm. OK, let's see - Crystal Palace finally admit they're shit. Hey, you said that anything could happen, Terry.......... (2) "Wimbledon were a class apart" - Wolves Official Site commentator. That's what we like to hear.
So, was it worth it? No, of course it wasn't worth us going just north of Birmingham to watch us totally outplay a team who we've struggled to beat in the past and reduce the home crowd to leaving 10 minutes early. God, what a stoooooopid question.....
In a nutshell: The playoffs beckon. Maybe.
1 April 2001 [AM EDITION]
Before I start, this will the last ever posting of SW19's ARMY. I've decided that I've had enough and will close down the site this time tomorrow. It's been a good 18 months of doing it, it's gotten me some great pleasure and (occasional) abuse, and...................................
Yeah, it's an April Fool joke. I'm not planning on closing the site down just yet, he he. Although this ain't an April Fools joke - I'll update the archive some time when I have a spare few hours. In 2002.
Trotters
2 Cloven Hooves 2, although
to be totally honest it was a smash and grab raid and then some. Probably
our worst performance since Watford away, although that was at the
very beginning of the year so it's quite a good run of form. Haven't
read any reports so I'll just say that we only had about 4 shots on
target and scored with two of them. Bolton did MUCH more running than
we did and probably should have won. But hey, who cares? I don't.
They scored first with a free kick, but we hit back almost immediately
with our first attempt on goal in about the 26th min. Yup, you read
that right. We played a bit better second half, but poor marking led
to that evil elbowing larynx-smashing thug Hendry to net. Sooper Cooper
(goals are gonna find him) hit the post, then in the 94th minute or
so Sooper had a shot and went in the net. Via a MAJOR deflection from
the Caledonian throat destroyer. Ha. And everyone went home happy,
well we did anyway....
Onto the action:
Plus points: We didn't lose. The way we hit back for the first goal immediately shows the difference between this and the last few seasons. Promising debut for Neilsen (who I'm told looks like Ali G in his big puffa coat, hopefully we'll be spared the phony ebonics associated with Mr G, but I'm not holding my breath) and Sooper. Some good saves from KD.
Minus points: We didn't win. Too many times we looked lethargic. Defense got taken a part a bit too much for my liking. Not too sure about Andy Roberts and Neil Ardley still.
Twats: (1) Colin Hendry.
Sarcastically clapped us when we were taking him to task for his horrific
assault on a San Marino player. Bet if he did that in the street to
someone (the elbowing) he'd be in the local slammer quicker than you
could say "reconstruction throat surgery". (2) The somewhat
enebriated Man Shitty fan on the train coming back. Lofty lookalike.
Kept on thinking we were Palace and singing that WFC were going down.
Also kept referring to Man U as "Munichs", very tasteful.
(3) I'm sure certain other people can fill me in far better here,
but there was an incident outside the ground that shows the mentality
of some accidents of birth. Basically, a couple of Bolton twats started
on a group of us, one of our number got a split lip. However, the
"best" is yet to come - this foot-and-mouth candidate started
on the female of the group, who beckoned him to "hit me".
Instead of doing so, the Bolton spasmo ran off to the nearest copper
and complained that he was being threatened by a woman. Dear oh fucking
dear.......
Quotes: (1) "The trains going to Auzwich move faster than this" - politically incorrect Womble on the upward journey when we were crawling past Crewe. (2) "I'm going to start a website and start quoting you on it" - you-know-who. I wouldn't advise it - you'd be closed down within a week on legal advice :) (3) "They've had a two week layoff and they're sluggish" - same politically incorrect Womble. Admittedly there DOES seem to be a major league problem with attitudes to fitness. Why?
Truth is stranger than fiction: Being on a Virgin train that ran on time and got in more-or-less into Euston when it was supposed to. You may need to read that again to fully appreciate this.
Nice: The cheeseburger and chips from Angelo's Cafe by Manchester Piccadilly. Mmmm.
Not so nice: (1) The lack of football pinky in Manchester on a Saturday evening. What other major city doesn't publish a sports paper after Saturday football, especially a big city where lots of people may be coming back from matches and may appreciate reading reports? Apart from London? (2) The doner kebab from the same establishment as mentioned above (photo on request). At least I know what happens to the carcasses of all the slain sheep and cows now.
So, was it worth it? I guess so.
In a nutshell: Who's up for Wolves?