26 February 2006

Well, there's a surprise. After the nadir wrist-slitting that manifested after our last two games at KM, we go to Fi$her and whip their arses into obedience. A wonder goal by Wes Daly, and even praise for Dwayne Plummer. Will he be the new RB?

Strange thing is, as far as weeks go in AFCWland, this has been pretty lousy. We had the aftermath of the draw against W&E, where people's prejudices finally came out in the open. Presumably, nooses will be tightened in the event that we get promoted this season. Either that or bedrooms in north Surrey will vibrate with the tones of a manaical sounding "hendoncunthendoncunthendoncunt" 24 hours a day. Perhaps the club shop kiosk could do a nice post-season line in straightjackets?

Then, we found out that the not-very-much-maligned Richard Butler finally had to go under the knife. He's out for six weeks or so, which means that he should make his comeback at the playoff final. As a spectator, of course. His injury was described as "gilmore's groin", which I thought was a Deep Purple tribute band. Although he'd been struggling for a while - he was on painkillers for Folkestone, which explains why he didn't come on - it all came rather quickly. And all this with the worst bit of timing since Yugotours put out their 1991 brochure.

To cap it all off, Harvey went. No, this in itself wasn't a problem, but not for the first time his departure left a sour taste in the mouth. On the OS, he was full of praise for us. In an (unbroadcast) interview, he was less content, even suggesting people were having a go at his missus. I don't doubt the guy is a nice bloke etc, but something didn't feel right when he was with us. Whether it was the meeja circus that followed us about with him I don't know, but the Sucker AM thing last week made us feel like a sideshow.

So, as you can imagine, we were expecting doom, gloom and free razor blades at our next KM game. I wasn't at the game, but from all accounts this was canine reproductive organs. The passing was good, the belief and desire was there, we were a team.

This appears to be a bit of the old style siege mentality coming out. While results this season showed that we've drawn far too many games, the performances improve when we're on a downer. Heybridge Swifts spring to mind, and how H&R got away with beating us I still don't know.

All this eulogising means jack shit if we don't pick up points where we should. I'm not expecting much from Braintree next week TBH, although I still don't think they're that far ahead of us. But I am expecting us to sort out Margate and Chelmsford.

Thankfully, we have more away games than home ones left, and it's the toxic atmosphere at KM that could scupper things. If anything, we need a good arse kicking of a lowly side at KM to show we're serious. It's a cliche, but things are really in our hands right now....

One final thing, isn't this more exciting than being a zillion points clear in a pub league?

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19 February 2006

If I'm being honest, I really can't be arsed to do a proper report on Republicans 1 Royals 1. Something really didn't feel right yesterday. Christ, Dwayne Plummer was the best player on the pitch...

While I accept that the publicity is good, I'm not sure if cultivating Sucker AM is such a good idea. There was an element of media circus yesterday that doesn't suit us. How many times in the past have we built up something only for it to fall flat? Wallingford away in the first season springs to mind, and there was a definite "was that it?" about yesterday.

Admittedly, I won't miss the hangers on that we saw yesterday. Their money is nice, but you can't help thinking they were there to watch two players instead of the team. Plus the fact that you couldn't see half the time (I still don't think that KM can cope with over 3500 people in it - if not for safety then certainly for comfort).

Actually, games at KM really do seem to suck. Compared to away games, certainly. This was one of my first Saturday games as a fan at der Volkstadion for a while, and it just felt surly. Or was that the weather? In the press box, you do have to concentrate on proceedings a lot more, so you don't really get the vibe outside. Standing inbetween the MS and the Tempest, you can see the gloom clouds.

It's not like we haven't been here before this season. The reactions after W&H in the FA Cup were similar, though back then we did have the ready made excuse reason that the hAE wasn't open which was affecting us. It's now open, and well used, so why the reverting to type?

The game being shite doesn't really bother me as such. These things happen, and it's not like we've never seen shite games before (Coventry at PL/SP spring to mind). I know that perhaps the team should play better to get the crowd going, though I think it's a bit of a two way thing. And let's face it, we've never been a Portsmouth at the best of times.

Some of the reactions to DA yesterday disturb me. I've just written (and subsequently deleted) a whole load of stuff on why wanting his head is a bad idea. The calls for him to go are mostly out of kneejerkism and frustration, I hope. After all they're not exactly vocal when we have a good result. Strange that.

But when you think about it, we're still in with a shout of the playoffs. We're inconsistent, but nothing drastically wrong. We're certainly not fighting relegation. Many of our points dropped this season have been down to little lapses. Basically, calling for DA's head right now stinks of grass-is-greener syndrome*. The same syndrome that has crippled Manchester City for the last 30 years (and like us, they've got a big fanbase and lots of "potential").

* - for the unintiated, it's the attitude that if we don't win a couple of games, then everything is wrong and only a new manager can sort it. Usually found in supporters of severely underachieving clubs. Not to be confused with Divine Right Syndrome, although some of our fans suffer from that as well.

If there's time for a managerial review, it's this time next year. By that stage we should be far more settled, and we should have the measure of how to beat the likes of W&E and Margate. If we haven't, then DA has failed. That's football. Being in the RP next season will not hurt this club. Creating a poisoned chalice will....

Granted, I'd prefer it if DA could show a bit more patience at times (then again, very few of our fans seem to show it either), and just settle on one or two styles of play. But overall we're in a far stronger position than we were last season. And if we decided to treat this season as the "transitional" one that we all knew it would be, there would be far less misery about.

There were, believe it or not, a couple of positives. The main one being that Lovejism was apparently ignored by everyone when he arrived (Ms Chamberlain got the five-star treatment).

And Franchise lost 5-0...

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17 February 2006

First things first. Like London buses, I received two Margate reports at once in my inbox. If you're the sort who rubbernecks at car crashes, clic ici. And unlike London buses, I won't charge you £1.50 per journey.

Secondly, we've got yet another new signing. And once again, it's a signing that you may have even remotely heard of. While Kim Grant may not stick around long, it's yet another sign that (on field) the club is going in the right direction. How cool would it be if he got a World Cup place thanks to us?

I've waxed lyrical far too much about the significance of signing ex-league players, so I'll keep schtum until we sign Marcus Gayle on a free in the summer. What I will say is this : the fact that we can now attract such players is almost worth promotion this season. Yeah, so it's another chop/change of the squad, and if you look below not everything appears sweetness and light. But if you look at Conf South teams, they have their fair share of ex-leaguers. Hell, Yeading last season had DJ Campbell (whatever happened to him?). Certainly, the excitement showing on various on-line opinion outlets is telling.

Meanwhile, at the other end of the spectrum, I came across a piece about Mark Peters in the Basingstoke Gazette last week. The quotes are a couple of weeks old, and the link I had isn't working. But these following passages are very, very interesting.

He went on: "I am not all about money, but I wanted to try to earn more for the family and felt I had done enough to get that money by getting a contract.

"When Ernie didn't give me it, I thought going somewhere else to earn more was the way to go.

"But with all the travelling to Eastleigh and then AFC Wimbledon, where I didn't get expenses, the 50, 100 and 150-mile round trips made it hard financially."

Bold emphasis mine.

OK, he wasn't a favourite, but that will explain a lot about why he looked shite. If it's true, of course. I hope that this was a one off, and a very good explanation is forthcoming. But it does worry me that even now, some players aren't getting the minimum you expect from a club, especially one our size.We're not a tiddler like RPV.

True, we know that most players are mercenaries, even (or especially) at this level. Contrary to the viewpoint that some of our fans seem to have, not every player will crawl over broken glass to join us, be conversant in every single anti-MK protest and willingly join the Dons Trust on arrival. But (again, if true), it may explain why some players never quite put the effort in. It does seem fucked that we can put in ex-league players at one level and expect others to complete hugely costly round trips for the mythical "love of the club". Let's hope that KG and our other newbies are getting slightly more than their bus fare home...

Finally, we're being treated (if that's the right word) tomorrow with the presence of Soccer AM. Or to give it its proper title, Sucker AM. I forget why, apparently it's something to do with Harvey and some bloke who plays for W&E. Anyway, we're getting on telly so expect us to lose 3-1.

Fortunately, it appears that we won't be contaminated with the presence of Tim Lovejism. As you know, he swapped Watford for Chelski because it looked better on his credibility CV. No more needs to be said, but it does remind me of a story I read once about Fantasy Football League. Basically, an Everton fan turned up to a recording once, and asked for an Everton shirt to wear, as par the format of the show. Fair enough. Except they couldn't find an Everton shirt. So, what did FFL tell him? "Sorry, we don't have an Everton shirt. You'll have to wear a Leeds shirt instead...". YCNMIU.

One more thing. This is a word of warning for anyone who wants to do that retarded "Easy" handclap for the Sucker AM cameras. Don't. By doing said clap, you are making yourself look like every other single fuckwit "footie" fan that infests our football grounds. You are not funny. You are not being "joyful". You are not capable of being ironic. You are a shitstain. You are unoriginal and watch Big Brother because you're told to. And you accept because you haven't got the personality to think for yourself and realise what a cunt you look. You vote for James Blunt in "best song" polls. In short, you're a Franchise fan. I hope you are caught with cartoons of the Prophet Mohammed outside Finsbury Park mosque.

Now, where's that article I did eons ago about Soccer AM.....?